February 2012
me: omg i'm so fat what's wrong with me
me: i'm gonna work really hard to get a super hot body
me two minutes later: omg is that cake
Every porno on earth.
guy: you like this dick?
girl: yeah
guy: yeahhh?
girl: yeahhh
guy: yeahhhhhhh?
girl: yeahhhhhhh
guy: yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh?
girl: yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Did you know that all the numbers from 1 - 999...
julie-fish:
cumberhiddles:
lmaogtfo:
How is it possible you can feel something so...
January 2012
The Universe hates me.
So I didn’t get paid for weeks after Christmas, and thus couldn’t pay my phone bill. Strike one. I paid half of it Tuesday, and THEN they barred my phone. Strike two. I FINALLY sorted it all out yesterday, and I still haven’t been un-barred because the systems are all being upgraded and my payments haven’t been processed. And so, ladies and gentlemen, we have strike three.
Oh goody. My phone bill is overdue cos I didn't...
So my phone has been barred. Fuck me. I hate not having a job. FML.
women: i want to have equal rights
women: you cant hit me i'm a girl